Principle 06 · from the Enchiridion
Be proud of character
Possessions and status tell us little about character. Look at your choices and how you treat people when measuring your progress.
Source passage (English)
The passage is shown in English. The explanation and example below are modern interpretations for this site.
Don't be prideful with any excellence that is not your own. If a horse should be prideful and say, "I am handsome," it would be supportable. But when you are prideful, and say, "I have a handsome horse," know that you are proud of what is, in fact, only the good of the horse. What, then, is your own? Only your reaction to the appearances of things. Thus, when you behave conformably to nature in reaction to how things appear, you will be proud with reason; for you will take pride in some good of your own.
What this means
It is easy to build an identity around work, status, connections, or the things we own. Epictetus points out that all of these can change. They are not the same as our character.
What sits closer to our control is how we choose and act. If you want something to be proud of, look at whether you were honest, fair, and able to govern yourself. That measure is less fragile than one built on what you happen to have.
Character becomes easier to assess when you look at a specific choice. Did you admit a mistake, give someone fair credit, or keep a promise you could reasonably fulfill? You can enjoy an achievement and acknowledge the help behind it without using it to rank your worth above other people's.
An everyday example
A colleague buys an expensive car, and suddenly you are comparing your whole life with theirs. Before that comparison runs away with you, ask what you are actually measuring.
The car may be lovely. It still tells you very little about whether either of you is living well. Bring the measure back to your own choices and conduct.
Reflection Question
What have you been using to measure your worth lately: what you have, or how you behave?